Death of our loved one

[Arundhati]

Death of a loved one
How can we accept the death of a loved one?


The following passage was taken from Sri Chinmoy's book entitled Death and Reincarnation:


We are all like passengers on a single train. The destination has come for one particular passenger. He has to get off at this stop, but we still have to go on and cover more distance. Now we have to know that this hour of death has been sanctioned by the Supreme. Without the approval or tolerance of the Supreme, no human being can die. So if we have faith in the Supreme, if we have love and devotion for the Supreme, we will feel that the Supreme is infinitely more compassionate than any human being, infinitely more compassionate than we who want to keep our dear ones. Even if the dying person is our son, or our mother or father, we have to know that he is infinitely dearer to the Supreme than he is to us. The Supreme is our Father and our Mother. If one member of the family goes to the father and mother, the other members of the same family will never feel sad. If we have taken to the spiritual life and want to have real joy, we must know that we can have this only by surrendering our life to the Will of the Supreme. Now we may not know what the Will of the Supreme is, but we do know what surrender is.

If the Supreme wants to take somebody away from our life, we must accept this. “Let Thy Will be done.” If this is our attitude, then we will have the greatest joy. And this joy does the greatest service to the one who is going to depart. When we totally surrender to the Supreme, this surrender becomes additional strength and power for the departing soul that is suffering here in bondage. So if we really surrender our will to the Will of the Supreme, then this surrender will verily bring peace, an abiding peace, to the soul that is about to leave the earth scene.

Those who have started meditating and concentrating are getting glimpses of their past incarnations. If we believe we had a past and we know we have a present, then we can also feel that we will have a future. Knowing this, we have to be always conscious of this truth: that there is no death. In the Bhagavad Gita it is said, “As a man discards his old clothes and puts on new ones, so does the soul discard this physical body and take on a new body.” When we know that the person who is going to die is just leaving aside this old body before accepting a new one, and if the person who is dying also has the same knowledge, how can there be any fears? We do not know what death actually is; that is why we want to stay here on earth as long as possible. But real death is not the dissolution of the physical body. Real death, spiritual death, is something else.

—Sri Chinmoy, Death and Reincarnation

[Tapan Mukherjee]

Every minute is unlimitedly precious. We cannot buy back even one minute of lost time, even if we possess all the world's wealth. Therefore time should not be squandered in unnecessary sense gratification. We should instead fully dedicate our every thought, word, and deed in all times, places, and circumstances to awakening our dormant God consciousness and the God consciousness of others. This is the proper utilisation of the human form of life, nothing else. This scrupulous use of our limited time in this body assures us of entrance into the transcendental kingdom of God at the time of our passing from our present body

[satyajitroyjoy]

Death & Life

"The self-existent Brahma created the senses with outgoing tendencies; therefore man beholds the external universe and not the internal Self. But some wise men with their senses turned away from the objects, desirous of immortality, turn their gaze inwards and behold the Self within"
- Katha Upanisad IV. 1

"And (the individual soul is) only a
reflection (of the Supreme Lord)"
- Brahma-Sutras, 50.

"An eternal portion of Myself having become a living soul in the world of life, draws to itself the five senses with the mind for the sixth, abiding in Nature"
-The Bhagavad Gita, Chapter 15, Verse 7

"The deluded do not see Him Who departs, stays and enjoys; but they who possess the eye of knowledge behold Him"
-The Bhagavad Gita, Chapter 15, Verse 10

"The Yogis, striving (for perfection) behold Him dwelling in the Self; but the unrefined and the unintelligent, even though striving, see Him not"
- The Bhagavad Gita, Chapter 15, Verse 11


"The dream (experience) is unreal in waking, whereas the waking (experience) is absent in dream. Both, however, are non-existent in deep sleep which, again, is not experienced in either. Thus all the three states are unreal inasmuch as they are the creation of the three Gunas (Sattwa, Rajas and Tamas); but their Witness (the Reality behind them) is beyond all Gunas, Eternal, One and is Consciousness itself."
- Aparokshanubhuti of Sri Sankaracharya V.57 & 58

The Process of Death
From The Brahadaranyaka Upanishad, IV,iii

[Note: In describing the rebirth of the soul, an example is given in earlier verses to show that just as the self wanders from the dream state to the waking state, so it passes from the present body to the next body].

Yajnavalkya said:
Just as a heavily loaded cart moves along, creaking, even so the self identified with the body, being presided over by the Self, which is all consciousness (the Supreme Self), moves along, groaning, when breathing becomes difficult (at the approach of death). 35.

When this body becomes thin - is emaciated through old age or disease- then, as a mango or a fig or a fruit of the peepul tree becomes detached from its stalk, so does this infinite being (the self), completely detaching himself from the parts of the body, again move on, in the same way that he came, to another body for the remanifestation (unfoldment ) of his vital force. 36.
[Note: 'Parts of the body ', Such as the eye, nose etc. In deep sleep, the gross body and organs, though left by the subtle body, are preserved by the prana (vital force). But this does not happen at the time of death, when the subtle body, together with the prana, leaves the gross body.]

Now when that self becomes weak and unconscious, as it were, the organs gather around it. Having wholly seized these particles of light, the self comes to the heart. When the presiding deity of the eye turns back from all sides, the dying man fails to notice colour. IV,1.
[Note: ' Presiding Deity ' The sun in its microcosmic aspect is the presiding or controlling deity of the eye. This deity helps the eye to function as long as a person lives, as determined by his past actions. At the time of death the deity stops his help and goes back to the sun. He again returns to the eye when the man takes another body.]

The eye becomes united with the subtle body; then people say: 'He does not see'. The nose becomes united with the subtle body; then they say:'He does not smell'. The tongue becomes united with the subtle body; then they say:'He does not taste'. The vocal organ becomes united with the subtle body; then they say; 'He does not speak'. The ear becomes united with the subtle body; then they say: 'He does not hear'. The skin becomes united with the subtle body; then they say: 'He does not touch (feel)'. The mind becomes united with the subtle body; then they say: 'He does not think'.
The intellect becomes united with the subtle body; then they say: 'He does not know '.

The upper end of the heart lights up, and by that light, the self departs, either through the eye, or through the head or through any other part (aperture) of the body.

And when the self departs, the vital force follows, and when the vital force departs, all the organs follow.

Then the self becomes endowed with a particular consciousness and passes on to the body to be attained by that consciousness.

It is followed by Knowledge, work and past experience. IV,2.

[Note: Compare Bhagavad Gita, Ch.8, Verse 6. "Whosoever at the end leaves the body, thinking of any being, that alone does he attain (become), because of his constant thought of that being." Comments:The last thought determines the next birth. The most prominent thought of one's life occupies the mind at the time of death.]

From Chandogya Upanishad:
Relatives sit around an ailing person, saying, "Do you recognise me, do you recognise me?" He recognises so long as his speech does not become merged in the mind, mind in the vital force, vital force in the warmth, and warmth into the supreme deity.VI,15,1.

Then when his speech merges into the mind, mind into the vital force, vital force into the warmth, and warmth into the supreme deity, he ceases to recognise. VI,15,2.

From Prashna Upanishad:
The year verily is Prajapati, and there are two paths thereof; the Southern and the Northern. Those who perform sacrifices and engage in pious actions, as duties to be done, win only the world of the Moon; verily they return here again. Therefore, the rishis who desire offspring travel by the Southern Path. This Path of the Fathers is Rayi, food. I.9

But those who seek the Self through austerity, chastity, faith and knowledge, travel by the Northern Path and win the Sun. The Sun, verily, is the support of all lives. He is immortal and fearless. He is the final goal. Thence they do not return. This path is blocked (for the ignorant). I.10

The sun is, indeed, Prana (vital force); moon is rayi, food. Food is, indeed, all this- what has form and what is formless. Therefore, everything having form s, indeed, food. I.5

Prajapati, the Creator, was desirous of progeny. He performed austerities, created the pair, the moon (rayi) and the sun (prana). He said to Himself: "These two should produce creatures for Me in manifold ways." I.4

From The Bhagavad Gita: The blesssed Lord said:
Gita- Ch 8,Verse 23:
Now I will tell thee the times departing at which the Yogis will return or not return.

Gita- Ch.8,Verse 24:
Fire, light, day-time, the bright fortnight, the six months of the northern path of the sun (the northern solstice)- departing then (by these) men who know Brahman go to Brahman.

[Note By Swami Shivananda, Divine Life Society, Rishikesh: This is the northern path or the path of light by which the Yogis go to Brahman. This path leads to salvation. The six months of the northern solstice is from the middle of January to the middle of July. It is regarded as the better period for death. Refer also to . Brahama-Sutras 4.2.18 and 19].

Gita- Ch.8, Verse 25:
Attaining to the lunar light by smoke, night time, the dark fortnight, also the six months of the southern path of the sun (the southern solstice), the Yogi returns.

[Note: This is the pitryana or the path of the ancestors, the path of darkness which leads to rebirth.Those who do sacrifices to the gods, and do other charitable works with expectation of reward go to the Chandraloka through this path and come back to this world when the fruits of the karmas are exhausted. ' ' Smoke', ' night time', ' the dark fortnight', and ' the six months of the southern solstice' are all deities who preside over them. They may denote the degree of ignorance, attachment and passion. There are smoke and dark coloured objects throughout the course. There is no illumination when one passes along this path. It is reached by ignorance. Hence it is called the path of darkness or smoke.]

Gita- Ch.8, Verse 26:
The bright and the dark paths of the world are verily thought to be eternal; by the one (the bright path) a man goes not to return and by the other (the dark path) he returns.

[Note: The bright path is the path to the gods taken by the devotees. The dark path is of the manes taken by those who perform sacrifices and charitable acts with the expectation of rewards. These two paths are not open to the whole world. The bright path is open to the devotee and the dark one to those who are devoted to the rituals.]

Gita- Ch.8, Verse 27:
knowing these paths, O Arjuna, no Yogi is deluded; therefore at all times be steadfast in Yoga.

Gita- Ch.8, Verse 28:
Whatever fruit of merit is declared (in the scriptures) to accrue from the study of the Vedas, the performance of sacrifices, the practice of austerities and gifts; beyond all these goes the Yogi, having known this; and he attains to the Supreme Primeval Abode.

From Isa Upanishad:
[Note:Translations and comments by Swami Nikhilananda. The last four verses of The Isa upanishad deal with prayer of the aspirant on his death-bed. He prays to the sun, a vivid symbol of Brahman (Supreme Reality), to withdraw the outer physical light so that the inner effulgence of Truth may be revealed. As the hour of death approaches, he fills his mind with the memories of his good deeds; the thought at the final moment determines the course of the soul hereafter. And lastly, he prays to Fire (Agni), which will soon consume his physical body, to lead his soul through the way of the Gods to Brahmaloka, from which he will attain final Liberation.]

Isa Upanishad, Mantra 15:
The door of the Truth is covered by a golden disc. Open it, O Nourisher! Remove it so that I who have been worshipping the Truth may behold It.

[Note: The worship prescribed in this and the following verses is the symbolic worship of Brahman through the sun. 'golden' = luminous]

Isa Upanishad, Mantra 16:
O Nourisher, lone Traveller of the sky! Controller! O Sun, Offspring of Prajapati! Gather your rays; withdraw your light. I would see through Your grace, that form of Yours which is the fairest. I am indeed He, that Purusha, who dwells there.

[Note: Purusha: Literally means Person. It also refers to the Godhead, who resides in the hearts of all, or who fills the whole universe with life and consciousness.]

Isa Upanishad, Mantra 17:
Now may my breath return to the all-pervading, immortal Prana! May this body be burnt to ashes! Om. O mind, remember, remember all that I have done.

[Note: 'May this body...' That is to say, may the subtle body (linga sharira) come out of the gross body. According to the Vedic seers, a subtle body dwells inside and pervades the gross body. The impressions of a man's good and evil deeds and thoughts remain embedded in this subtle body. The individual soul dwelling in this body experiences, after death, the happy or unhappy results of its actions. The gross body is destroyed after death, but the subtle body remains unimpaired till the attainment of Liberation through Knowledge.]

Isa Upanishad, Mantra 18:
[Note: The dying man again prays for a higher course after death]:
O Fire (Agni), lead us by the good path for the enjoyment of the fruit of our action. You know, O god, all our deeds. Destroy our sin of deceit. We offer, by words, our salutations to you.

[Note: 'by words': At the time of death the devotee cannot offer any other worship to the god. As his limbs become inert, he cannot prostrate himself; hence the salutations through words alone.]

[General notes: The path of Brahmaloka (the highest heaven from which one does not return to earth) lies through what has been described in the Upanishads and the Bhagavad Gita as the Devayana or Way of the Gods, which is characterised by various luminous stages, such as flame, day, the bright fortnight of the moon, the bright half of the year (when the sun travels northward), the sun, and lightning. It is also called the Northern Path. There is another path, called the Pitriyana, the Way of the fathers, or the Southern Path, which leads to Chandraloka, the Plane of the Moon.

To it go, after death, those householders who have performed their obligatory duties and worshipped the gods, following the scriptural rules, with a view to enjoying the results of their meritorious actions in this lower heaven. The path leading to Chandraloka is characterised by dark stages, such as smoke and not flame, night and not day, the dark frotnight of the moon and not the bright, and the months of winter and not of summer. After enjoying the results of their meritorious actions in the lower heaven, souls come back to earth and are born as ordinary mortals.]

From Brahma-Sutras 4.2.17.
Commentary by Swami Vireswarananda, Adwaita Ashram, Mayavati:

This Sutra says that though the illumining of the top of the heart is common to both, yet the knower of the Saguna Brahman, through the grace of the Lord who abides in the heart, departs through the skull only, while others depart through other parts.

From Chandogya Upanishad:8.6.6.
There are a hundred and one nerves of the heart; one of them penetrates the head; going up along that, one attains immortality; the others serving for departure in various directions.

From The Bhagavad Gita, Ch.8
Verses 5, 6,10,13,15 & 16
Translations and comments by Swami Shivananda
The Divine Life Society, Rishikesh

And whosoever, leaving the body, goes forth remembering Me alone, at the time of death, he attains My Being: there is no doubt about this. 5

Whosoever at the end leaves the body, thinking of any being, to that being only does he go, because of his constant thought of that being. Verse 6

At the time of death with unshaken mind, endowed with devotion, by the power of Yoga, fixing the whole life-breath in the middle of the two eyebrows, he reaches that resplendent Supreme Person. 10

[Note: The Yogi gets immense inner strength and power of concentration. His mind becomes quite steady through constant practice of concentration and meditation. He practises concentration first on the lower Chakras, Viz., Muladhara, Svadhisthana, and Manipura. He then concentrates on the lotus of the heart (Anahata Chakra). Then he takes the life-breath (Prana) through the Susumna and fixes it in the middle of the two eyebrows. He eventually attains the resplendent Supreme Purusha (Person) by the above Yogic practice. This is possible for one who has devoted his whole life to the practice of Yoga.]

Uttering the one-syllabled Om (AUM, the Brahman or the Supreme Reality), and remembering Me, he who departs, leaving the body, attains to the Supreme Goal. 13

Having attained Me these great souls do not again take birth (here) which is the place of pain and is non-eternal; they have reached the highest perfection (liberation). 15

(All) the worlds, including the world of Brahma are subject to return again, but he who reaches Me has no rebirth. 16




OM TAT SAT

[Tapan Mukherjee]

If the world population knew the science of bhakti, this entire planet would become transformed into a paradise. Peace and happiness would predominate. All forms of material distress would be greatly reduced. The climatic conditions would become pleasing. There would abundant supplies of fresh water and sumptuous foodstuffs. The political leaders would be ideal examples of saintly behavior. The world economy would become stabilized with full employment for all. Family life would become so happy that nobody would ever desire divorce. There would be a renaissance of transcendental expression in the form of art, drama, music, poetry, and architecture, and philosophy. Science would progress to the point of finally fully discovering the secrets of the universe. If they only knew, if they only knew.